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of Saint Faith's Church, Great
Crosby
Saint Faith’s Prayer for
Mission
Faithful God, in baptism you have adopted us as your children,
made us members of the body of Christ and chosen us as inheritors
of your kingdom:
bless our plans for mission and outreach; guide us to seek and do
your will;
empower us by your Spirit to share our faith in witness and to serve,
and send us out as disciples of your Son Jesus Christ our Lord.
Amen
FEBRUARY 2006
When the song
of the angels is stilled,
When the star
in the sky is gone,
When the
kings and princes are home,
When the
shepherds are back with their flock,
The work of
Christmas begins:
To find
the lost,
To heal
the broken,
To feed
the hungry
To release
the prisoners,
To rebuild
the nations,
To bring
peace among people,
To make
music in the heart.
'Christ has
many services to be done; some are easy, others
are difficult;
some bring honour, others bring reproach;
some are
suitable to our natural instincts and material
interests,
others are contrary to both. In some we may please
Christ and
please ourselves, in others we cannot please
Christ except
by denying ourselves. Yet the power to do all
these things is
given us in Christ who strengthens us.'
From the liturgy of the Baptism of
the Lord
From
the Ministry Team: February 2006
Dear friends.
One of the good things about the Calendar of the Church of England is
that we keep the season of Epiphany right through to Candlemass, with
white being the colour for the vestments and the Crib remaining in
place. Of course it is difficult keeping the "Christmas" feeling going
when life has returned to what passes for normal, but during the
Epiphany season we are drawn to consider themes of vocation and mission
as well as observing where the journey of the Magi took them. On
the day of writing this we renewed our baptismal promises on the Feast
of the Baptism of the Lord. Just as Our Lord's baptism was for Him the
beginning of Ministry and Mission, so we are reminded that through
baptism each of us is called to Ministry and Mission. It's not about a
dog collar - it's about taking God seriously.
That often comes at a cost though - time is costly, our financial
giving should be sacrificial, and of course we are preaching a message
in a world which often wants to hear the opposite. It is no coincidence
that the very day after celebrating Christmas we celebrate a martyr's
death, St. Stephen. A reminder that the Christian life is not all
tinsel and turkey! Far from it.
Looking back on 2005 we have certainly much to be thankful for; A new
form of Eucharistic worship now on the first Sunday of each month,
seeking to engage and involve more people of all ages; a regular bible
study in the context of the eucharist on a Friday evening coming as a
result of the parish survey undertaken by the
mission group last year; a Christian "basics" course, again as a result
of the survey, giving an opportunity for us not just to share our faith
together but to listen, learn,
question and debate. A new approach to our ministry with those seeking
baptism for their children; a new team of Eucharistic ministers able to
offer to take Communion to people each Sunday in their homes if they
wish, an over 65's holiday club - a first for our United Benefice. All
in all some marvellous new innovations. Of course not everything will
please everyone, but it would be a very peculiar world (to say nothing
of a peculiar church) if all the people were
pleased all the time! I feel sure that these blessings have
come as a result of our prayers and seeking the guidance of the Lord
for our two parishes. After all we pledged ourselves to using a prayer
for Mission - is it that impossible to believe our prayers are being
answered? How often do we truly look for answers to prayers we have
offered?
For the Magi, their agenda was most certainly set by the Light of the
Lord as they journeyed into the unknown. We could do no better in this
Epiphany season than to consider how they let themselves be guided, as
we seek to place ourselves into the Lord's hands to do His will.
I am certain that 2006 will be every bit as exciting as 2005, if not
more so!
With my love and prayers
Father Neil
Lord, you call us to your service:
'In my name baptise and teach,'
that the world may trust your promise,
life abundant meant for each,
give us all a clearer vision
draw us in community;
with the Spirits gifts empow'r us
for the work of ministry.
Thursday 2nd
February
CANDLEMASS
(The Presentation of Christ in the Temple)
10.30am Eucharist
with hymns
8.00 pm Sung Eucharist &
Procession of Light
Preacher: Fr.
Robert Hart (S. James, Haydock)
The United Benefice Dramatic Society
proudly presents:
Dick
Whittington
Wednesday 22nd February - Sunday 26th February
Shrove
Tuesday Dinner: 28 February
The popular PARISH DINNER will be at Master McGrath's, Scarisbrick,
again. The price is as last year: £12.50 for 2 courses,
£14.50 for 3. Cheques, payable to "Master McGrath's" to Audrey
Dawson, please, before the dinner. A coach will leave St Faith's at
6.45 pm - the more on the coach, the lower the cost per person!
Diary of
Events
Please make sure you get your copy from Church and please put the dates
of events in your diaries NOW!
Money
Matters!
Do you know how much it will cost to run S. Faith's in 2006?
Our Budget for 2006 requires us to raise £89,022
That means we need £7,418 per month
or... £ 1,712 per week
or... £ 243 per day
or... £ 10 per hour
or... 17 pence per minute!!
CAN YOU HELP US TO
KEEP SAINT FAITH'S OPEN?
A
Prayer for Epiphany-tide
Father, we thank you for revealing yourself to us in Jesus the Christ,
we who once were not your people but whom you chose to adopt as your
people. As ancient Israel confessed long ago, we realize that it was
not because of our own righteousness, or our own superior wisdom, or
strength, or power, or numbers. It was simply because you loved us, and
chose to show us that love in Jesus.
As you have accepted us when we did not deserve your love, will you
help us to accept those whom we find it hard to love? Forgive us, O
Lord, for any attitude that we harbour that on any level sees ourselves
as better or more righteous than others.
Will you help us to remove the barriers of prejudice and to tear down
the walls of bigotry, religious or social? O Lord, help us
realize that the walls that we erect for others only form our own
prisons!
Will you fill us so full of your love that there is no more room for
intolerance? As you have forgiven us much, will you enable us with your
strength to forgive others
even more? Will you enable us through your abiding Presence among us,
communally and individually, to live our lives in a manner worthy of
the Name we bear?
May we, through your guidance and our faithful obedience, find new
avenues in ways that we have not imagined of holding the Light of your
love so that it may be a
Light of revelation for all people.
We thank you for your love, praise you for your Gift, ask for your
continued Presence with us, and bring these petitions in the name of
your Son, who has truly
revealed your heart. Amen.
"... and falling to their knees they
did him homage.
Then, opening their treasures, they
offered him gifts of
gold and frankincense and myrrh."
Flying
the Flag for the Church
Chris Price
At the Christmas Eve midnight mass at St Faith's, the visiting
preacher, Fr Geoffrey Hardman, gave me food for thought. He spoke of
the Roman Catholic Church as being the church of Good Friday, with its
emphasis down the centuries on suffering and penitence. The Eastern
Orthodox Church was seen as the Church of Easter, with its joyous (and
lengthy!) liturgies and overflowing Eastertide churches. Our own Church
of England was the Church of Christmas, with its gift of celebrating
the great festival of the Nativity and Incarnation especially
memorably.
Our own Christmas services, as ever, certainly lived up to this
billing, and this is the time to give thanks for Fr Neil, and for all
who, in so many ways, made this so and enabled our mission to the
parish to be celebrated so splendidly for so many. But this article
pays tribute also to the Church of England in Broxtowe, in Lozells, in
Bow - and at the great cathedrals of Norwich and Gloucester. The first
three of these places were celebrated in the Daily Telegraph on
Christmas Eve: the other two hosted splendid midnight masses on rival
TV channels. All five showed, it seemed to me, our church at its very
best.
The newspaper article was called 'Faith under Fire', and it wrote of
three parish priests ministering in the most trying and difficult of
circumstances. The Rev. Philip
Nott, who ministers in a violent and deprived area of Nottingham, has
been robbed and assaulted, and his family are almost under siege - but
his work and witness have never faltered. In the Lozells suburb of
Birmingham racial tension is high, and a recent violent confrontation
between Afro-Caribbeans and Asians saw petrol bombs, burnt-out cars and
shops and a fatal stabbing. Undeterred, 'a tiny woman in a dog collar
and a sari' - Canon Jemima Prasadam, the local Anglican vicar, walks
the streets, building bridges between communities and faiths,
'reaffirming the neighbourhood' and accepted and seemingly loved by
all. Finally, the Rev Philippa Boardman, of St Paul's, Bow in east
London, has rescued a dying church earmarked for closure and is
building a living witness, despite having been shot at, received death
threats and been dogged by a stalker.
The reporter, David Hughes, admits to being a non-churchgoer but is
deeply impressed by these three priests, keeping the flag flying for
the oft-derided national
church in areas where almost every other denomination had
given up the ghost. All three see themselves as ministering to
everyone on their respective patches, whatever their faith or lack of
it - the great and abiding strength of the Anglican parish system, it
seems to me. Hughes's final paragraph deserves quoting in full.
'I asked members of the congregations at each parish what life would be
like without their churches and vicars. All were visibly appalled at
the idea. Then one lady from Bow said quietly, "Let's just say that,
whenever Philippa isn't here, life just isn't the same".'
The two televised services were from splendid mediaeval cathedrals,
both packed with worshippers, and both powerful, colourful, splendidly
ritualistic and
professionally presented. ITV had illuminated Norwich in the glowing,
even garish olour floods that we at St Faith's remember from the BBC's
Advent services here a year ago. There were celebrity readers
(including Matthew Kelly and 'her off Coronation Street'), and solos
from the pure-toned Hayley Westenra and the
packaged trebles of The Choirboys. The Bishop (well known to several
here, and especially to Fr Dennis) presided impressively, and the
ritual, the music and the
presentation were all splendid. There were several glimpses of our
previous vicar Fr Richard amongst the assembled cathedral luminaries.
The service, like those from St Faith's, was pre-recorded and slickly
packaged.
The service from Gloucester, my home and dearly-loved cathedral, was
broadcast live in its uncut entirety by the BBC. Processions, rituals,
incense, music and
consecration were shown as they happened, and it must have been a
nerve-racking experience for all concerned. In particular, the lengthy
process of giving communion to a full cathedral was shown in full, and
very impressive it was too. The lighting was more natural, and the
great round Norman pillars were shown in all their unadorned power and
height. For my money, this was the more natural act of worship: all who
took part seemed to be locals, and there was little sense of a
performance for the cameras. Long sequences of Vierne's Messe Solenelle
acompanied the liturgy, the choir sang their hearts out, and the whole
service was
allowed its proper heavenly length.
So: five handfuls from the lucky dip that is the Church of England.
What they had in common was to show that our churches at this Christmas
season are flying the flag in great style - and doing so at both ends
of the spectrum. Whether ministering to tiny congregations in
beleaguered inner city slums or giving it all they'd got in
incomparably splendid cathedrals, the Anglican Church, its priests and
people, is doing what it does best - caring for all manner of folk in
all manner of places. And
while this is so, we can be glad of it, and even proud to be part of a
communion that can proclaim the truth of the gospel so well - and so
movingly.
Suffer
the Little Children?
Judith Skinner
Over the past couple of months it has been lovely to see more children
and young people getting involved in church services, with the family
service organised by the mission group, the various Advent activities
and the introduction of the crèche in the Chapel of the Cross. I
feel this goes some way to making children and young
families feel more welcome in church. However something has been
bothering me.
I recently overheard an extremely negative comment (no I wasn't
eavesdropping) regarding children being involved in the Sunday
Eucharist. Apparently a small
number of the congregation feel the children are a disruption and
should stay in Sunday School throughout the whole of the service. I
wasn't alone when I heard this,
my daughter was stood with me and asked the question "why don't people
want us in church mummy?" I was angry to the point of tears. It wasn't
the first time I had
heard comments like this during the 11 years I have been attending St
Faith's.
I can honestly say that, in those 11 years, the number of people who
have not made us feel welcome and part of a Christian family are only a
small percentage of the
total congregation. I have however heard people criticizing my daughter
about the way she conducts herself during service as an acolyte. How on
earth are we going to be able to encourage families to join us at St
Faith's when this kind of attitude continues? We have so few children
and young people at St Faith's as it is.
Sometimes a morning at church can be like an episode of 'Eastender's:
people talking behind others' backs, complaining about the kids,
judging people who they
have never even taken time out to speak to. I am extremely proud of
Emily, her dedication to her serving duties, her keenness to attend
Sunday School as often as
she can, her impeccable manners and courtesy shown to others. I
appreciate the lovely comments that other people have made in support
of this and it hurts me to
think of people being so dismissive of our children. They are our
future! Where will we be if because of comments like these, Emily and
others like her will stop
attending? I hope, for the sake of our church, this will never happen.
Medical Mayhem
When a panel of doctors were asked to vote on adding a new wing to the
local hospital, the Allergists voted
to scratch the idea and the
Dermatologists wanted no rash
moves. The Gastroenterologists had
a gut feeling that it was an
inside job, the Neurologists thought
the administration had a lot of
nerve, and the Obstetricians felt
they were labouring under a misconception.
The Ophthalmologists considered
the idea short-sighted, the
Pathologists protested 'Over
my dead body!' while the Paediatricians
said 'Grow up!' The Psychiatrists
thought it was madness, the Surgeons
wanted to wash their hands of the
whole thing and the Radiologists said
they could see right through
it.
The Internists thought it was
a bitter pill to swallow, but the Plastic
Surgeons said that recent events had put a whole new face on the
matter. The Podiatrists thought
it was a step forward, but the
Urologists felt the scheme
would not hold water.
The Anaesthetists thought the whole idea lacked sensitivity, but the
Cardiologists did not have the
heart to protest. Finally, the
Proctologists told the Manager
that they were sick of the whole thing, that he should pull his finger
out
and put an end to the matter.
The
Long Drop
There were these three trainee padres undergoing assessment, who were
told they had to undertake a parachute drop. They could refuse, but
were urged to take the plunge and identify with the life of a soldier.
Up in the plane, the R.C. trainee waited for the green light. When the
sergeant signalled him, he stood still. The sergeant touched his
shoulder and said: 'The
cardinal orders you to jump'. He jumped.
The Free Church minister likewise froze. The sergeant leant forward and
said: 'Your congregation wills you to jump'. He jumped.
Finally the Anglican was called forward - and he too froze at the
doorway. The canny sergeant shouted across to him: 'Your bishop
absolutely forbids you to jump'
He jumped!
(Thanks for both these items to Jane
Pitts, St Peter's Formby parish
magazine)
The
Annunciation
A sermon by Fred Nye
In 1489 an Italian priest by the name of Fra Roberto published a book
of his sermons. Fra Roberto was one of a group of popular preachers who
travelled widely
in Europe in the 15th century. They had a tremendous following and
hundreds of people would flock to hear them. Would that preaching
were as popular today!
Unfortunately these preachers became just a little too successful and
popular for the Pope's liking, and - sadly - they were banned by the
5th Lateran Council in 1512.
So much for the history lesson. More importantly for us, Fra
Roberto left us in his book of sermons an absolute gem of Christian
devotion. It is in the form of a
meditation on the Annunciation. In reading this sermon we need to
understand a couple of things about the Christian life as it was lived
500 years ago. The first thing
is that Fra Roberto's congregations would have been very familiar with
the huge number of paintings of the Annunciation that adorned the
churches of Europe at that
time. Mostly they would have needed only to look around them to see
Roberto's sermon vividly illustrated even as he was speaking. These
paintings were the
equivalent of today's overhead projector or Powerpoint presentation.
And the second thing we need to understand is that mediaeval Christians
were much better than we are at savouring each and every detail of a
bible story. Fra Roberto in his sermon draws out the full meaning of
St. Luke's Annunciation story, describing in detail each phase of
Mary's response to Gabriel's message. And, if you are interested, you
will find each one of Mary's turbulent emotions vividly portrayed in
15th century art.
"She was troubled at his saying." The news that Mary is to be the
mother of the Messiah is unbelievable, and not a little crazy. In fear
and disquiet she holds her
hand towards Gabriel in a gesture which is half defence, half
rejection. This messenger, this message, is at best intrusive; at worst
frightening and unwelcome.
"She cast in her mind what manner of greeting this might be." Mary
holds up both hands in a gesture of puzzlement - her fingers spread as
if to grasp something that is elusive and invisible. The gesture
is now of someone who is stunned and disorientated, someone trying to
make sense of something, trying to get to grips with
what is strange and overwhelming.
"How shall this be?" The Virgin gestures to Gabriel with her right hand
curved like a question mark. There is the beginning of understanding
but a thousand questions. Why me? Why now? How can I be expected to do
the impossible?
"Be it unto me according to your word." The Virgin's hands are folded
together, palms inwards, in a classical gesture of acceptance. God's
will is now her will, God's plan is now her plan. 'With God, nothing is
impossible'. Mary's hopes for a just and God-centred future, expressed
in the Magnificat, are now focussed on the Holy Child she is to bear.
The mediaeval preachers and artists haven't merely left us with a
powerful insight into the role of the BVM in the Incarnation of Our
Lord. They have left us with a sort of choreography of how God speaks
to every Christian soul. On our journey of faith we are closest to God
when we are at our most vulnerable. At times of change in our lives,
times when we experience deep joy or deep sadness, our comfort zone
gets broken down and God can at last reach us. It is at times like
this, when we experience the deep realities of life, that God can
change and renew our lives. We can see this happening when people come
to faith, or return to faith, through the experience of falling in
love, of having children, of surviving and recovering from illness or
accident, sometimes even through the painful experiences of loss,
bereavement and grief. And often the messenger comes, with soft and
gentle wings, as death approaches. Whenever we are faced by life's
challenges we can begin to understand the turmoil that Mary felt, as
she struggled to come to terms with the Annunciation. We may not at
first recognise Gabriel's arrival: the idea that God himself could be
speaking to us is hard to believe when all we can think about is the
intensity of our own personal experience. And the more painful the
experience, the more we will reject the notion that God, if good, could
be involved at all. But slowly, dimly, we begin to perceive that there
is some sort of meaning there, that there is some sort of message.
Deep sorrow and deep joy make us ask God questions. If deeply happy the
question is "How could I deserve this?" If deeply hurt, the question is
often exactly the same. In that search for meaning God tells us of his
total acceptance of us and of our lives, of his unconditional love for
us whatever the circumstances, and of our utter dependence on him, in
sickness and health, for richer for poorer, in life and in death.
There is a fifth portrayal of the Virgin in the Annunciation story.
Here she is depicted alone and dumbfounded after Gabriel had left her.
She continued to 'ponder
all these things in her heart'. And as she came to terms with Our
Lord's quite unexpected and dangerous style of life and ministry, with
the horrors of the
Crucifixion, and the awesome and inexplicable events of the
Resurrection, her heart must have often remained in turmoil. She would
have experienced all over again the emotions of the Annunciation: the
denial, the confusion, the questioning and the acceptance.
Most of the time God's messenger is busy elsewhere and doesn't bother
us too much. But every day we have to cope with the same dilemmas faced
by Our Lady: how to cope with the reality of the
Incarnation in our own lives. How can we meet
God's demands to live out the Christian life fully, dangerously -
and all in the dim light of that maddeningly inadequate
half-knowledge that he seems to give us? How can we respond when his
demands are so unreasonable? I sometimes feel like a McEnroe playing on
a sort of heavenly Centre Court, shouting at the Umpire "YOU CANNOT BE
SERIOUS!" How can we live our lives when a just and God-centred future
seems so unattainable? How can we cope when our wish for a better world
so far outstrips what we know we can actually achieve by ourselves? I
guess we can only follow the example of Mary, and experience with her
that Annunciation turmoil of emotion that re-visited her
throughout her life.
We can only trust God's power to achieve the impossible in us. We can
only pray that we may in the end be given the grace to say, with
Mary, our 'yes' to God.
Are
You Free?
David Jones
Are you free on any Saturday mornings in the summer from April to
August for our season of Summer Recitals? The season starts on
Saturday, 22 April and runs
through to the grand finale on Saturday, 26 August (the August Bank
Holiday weekend). The church is open from 11.00am - 1.00pm and the
recitals start at 12
noon, running for about half an hour.
We have a small but incredibly hard-working team who set up and put
away tables and chairs, provide catering and help with administration
each week, but we could do with more helpers! The more people on the
rota, the easier it becomes.
If you can help, please put your name on the list at the back of church
or speak to David Jones or Chris Price. Audrey Dawson manages the
catering rota and would welcome more helpers too. Please put your name
on the list or ring Audrey on 928 2770.
Thank you for your help and we hope you enjoy this year's programme.
End
of Term Report
Our 'Man for the Minuistry':
Autumn/Winter 2005
Hello everybody, on a scale of 1-9, I'm on 5! What happened to
term 4? It was the fastest yet; it flew by. When I last wrote to
you I was looking forward to the term starting in September with the
new intake of students.
All went smoothly, my lasting memory of that residential weekend in
Wakefield was the sense of community that exists amongst the students
and staff. I felt the need to share conversation, to ease concerns and
generally make the new students feel at home and welcome. But such
sympathies were also directed at the students of my own year, with the
added affection of the months spent together on this incredible
journey, and to those ahead of me in the third year. As a new student
in September 2004, I was unaware of any such community relationship and
I wondered, as I looked at the drawn strained faces of some of the new
intake if I had looked so worried. I probably did.
This intimate community of very different people (I speak of my own
year now) has provided the gel that has held us together during this
fourth term.
It has been a difficult term for us as a community but for me an
exceptional term academically - I refer not to my grades - they are not
for publishing! It has been
difficult in that we haven't had the normal amount of time as a group
together, that is when West side Manchester based students get together
with East side Mirfield
based students. Due to the size of our group our retreat in October and
November had us split in two, the retreat was silent so we couldn't
'catch up' with everybody's news; in addition we have also had a
teaching day at Mirfield, a Saturday, so it was a 'hello, how are you
and goodbye'. There are some students whom I haven't seen since
September and I will not be seeing again until January at the start of
term 5.
Academically the term has been a corker! With the exception of a few
epistles and the Gospel of Luke, we have been studying the New
Testament. It has been
marvellous to examine, compare and reflect upon the work of the
different writers and witnesses who have contributed to the New
Testament. It has been fascinating to look at the ministry of Christ
through the lens of the evangelists. For example, comparing the
desolation and mockery of Christ on the cross in St. Mark's Gospel with
the triumphant 'it is accomplished' from St. John's, one can easily
fall into the trap of having a 'preferred' Gospel, of having what some
writers refer to as 'a canon within a canon'; a lesson learnt is that
we need the balance of all four Gospels, a four-fold prism that both
separates and unites.
Term 5, which as I write is in six days time, has its own challenges,
my second placement. This time it's not a congregational placement but
one in a 'sector
ministry', i.e. a chaplaincy.
I have chosen to work in Whiston Hospital in Prescot alongside the
Chaplaincy team for the coming weeks. In fact I have already
started over the holiday period and have gained some valuable
experience and precious insights to this form of ministry. My next
update will no doubt reflect my experiences there.
I will not be around much in January and February due to the placement
and the course constraints, so please accept my very best wishes for a
blessed and happy
new year.
Martin Jones
P.C.
Year
Chris Price
No, not a reference to the amount of time the editor spends more or
less shackled to his Personal Computer, but a few extracts from a
recent newspaper compilation of some of the choicer examples of
Political Correctness and allied social absurdities encountered during
2005. The paper is, needless to say, the Daily Telegraph, scourge of
trendy excesses and the despair of liberals. Here are a few choice
selections with which to bid 2005 farewell.
A constable who saved the life of a man who was high on drugs by
stopping him jumping through a window was reprimanded. He was told he
had used 'undue force' in holding the man back from killing himself.
The man's father complained.
A teenage thug was ordered not to wear anything obscuring his face as
part of the terms of an ASBO slapped on him for terrorising local
residents. The ban was lifted after his lawyers claimed it 'interfered
with his right to his personal development'.
A man whose leg was amputated three years ago was told to report for a
new medical examination before his disabled parking permit could be
renewed. The
council had all his details, but insisted that everyone seeking renewal
had to be treated the same way.
Academics at Glasgow University spent £140,000 on a study which
concluded that people went to coffee shops so that they could enjoy
meeting their friends. The
report also revealed that when customers did not like the coffee in a
particular shop, they stopped going there. Another study, this time of
the power consumed by
electrical equipment, showed that turning them off was cheaper than
keeping them on all the time.
Staff at a conference at another university studied the 'meaning' of
David Beckham. They received a paper entitled 'Father Why Hast Thou
Forsaken Me? Post-
Modernism, Desire and Dissatisfaction: A Case Study in David Beckham's
Meaning'.
A 10-year old boy received a police warning for playing cowboys and
Indians with his little brother. He had a tiny cap gun, but a police
car screeched to a halt as he was firing it. The men inside - from an
armed response unit - told him he could be arrested for wielding a gun.
Belgian politicians went to congratulate the country's oldest woman on
reaching the age of 109. But a bureaucratic error ensured that no-one
had recorded her departure for Paris in 1939 - or her death there in
1954.
Orthodox Jews should not sing in Hebrew while having a shower,
according to a former chief rabbi in Israel. Hebrew was too sacred to
be used in the bathroom. But it is acceptable to hum - provided no word
of Hebrew crosses your mind as you do so.
A strip club in an Idaho town started advertising itself as a
life-drawing class and gave pencils and papers to all its customers.
The town bans public nudity 'unless it
has serious artistic merit'. The Erotic City's Art Night has proved a
dramatic success.
Police called to damage at a mediaeval church refused to climb a gently
sloping 13ft ladder to investigate because they had no specialist
ladder training. Only specialist units can climb ladders of that kind,
and none could be summoned because it was not an emergency.
A burglar in Bulgaria avoided a jail sentence by having a sex-change
operation while on bail. Bulgarian law does not recognise trans-gender
operations, so
technically the former man and present women are different people.
And finally, Czech officials started a campaign to cut down government
bureaucracy and waste by closing down a directorate that they had set
up to find
ways of cutting back on waste and red tape.
Hello
Boys and Girls!
Leo Appleton, the
Panto Producer writes...
Work is well under way and plenty of progress is being made on the
fourth United Benefice pantomime, 'Dick Whittington'. Auditions were
held back in
the summer, and rehearsals commenced at the end of September.
And now, after our Christmas break, it is time to pull all the various
strands together, ready for our February performances. At the time of
writing, music is being
finalised, props are being sought and waists are being measured.
The Dress Rehearsal of 'Dick Whittington' will take place in St Mary's
Church Hall on the evening of Tuesday, 21st February. Then it will be
time to put on the make-up and switch on the spotlights and unveil the
show to our eagerly awaiting public.
Shows will
take place:
Wednesday 22nd
February 7.30 p.m.
Thursday 23rd
February 7.30
p.m.
Friday 24th
Feburary
7.30 p.m.
Saturday 25th
February 2.30 pm
(matinee)
7.30 p.m.
Sunday 26th
February
2.30
p.m. (matinee)
Tickets will be priced at £6.00 (£4.00 concessions) and
will be available from Chris Price from Saturday, January 22nd, on a
strictly 'cash with order' basis..
It looks set to be a great week and a thoroughly enjoyable spectacle
for all who come along to enjoy our performances.
If you can help with refreshments or front of house please get in touch
with Chris.